I’m calling this the ‘Here’s What Happens Here’ Edition
This couple, somewhere in their fifties, married twenty plus years.
Walked in, both of them saying they weren’t particularly fulfilled in their marriage.
“We really just would like to be able to SEE each other again.
So much life has happened since we got together.
So many adjustments, job changes, kids, moves – we kind of lost sight of each other in the process.
We would love to give more attention to us.
To create more intimacy between the two of us – by way of talking about some of the things we haven’t been able to talk about for years – to being affectionate with one another again.
Rekindling our love for each other?
I don’t know, is that even possible at our age?
But I would love that.
Being able to know that we support each other, through the good days and the bad – that we are, in each other’s corners.
Having time together where I’m not wishing I was doing something else but where we are having so much fun that I don’t want it to stop.
Just being good spouses to one another. For both of us.”
Fast forward to graduation day.
It always comes super fast and catches everyone by surprise a little.
This is what they said:
“We’re so happy with the process.
A little surprised at the side effects, too – if I can say that.
We learned how to be more accountable for the things we do, and have done, how to love each other with the most impact on the other person.
You showed us how to be present in our relationship in a way that we, frankly, didn’t ever know how to do before.
And have never experienced.
Being helpful to one another, paying attention to what she needs, what I need – and then tending to those needs and wants.
And you taught us how to do communication – how to talk and express all issues with each other, and do it in a timely manner.
We can both say that we came to a level of understanding of ourselves – individually too – that we had no idea we were missing.
And from there, being able to talk through what we each wanted going forward with the marriage – that made all the difference.
Because no we are doing the planning together – as opposed to the other way around.
And – We’re having a blast – She surprises me at work.
We have impromptu lunches now.
Plan our weekends together – instead of him doing what he does, and me doing what I’d do.
We even went out to a friends’ place because we were confident and comfortable that we can now handle that, and we had such a fun night doing together.
When the kids came over two weekends ago, they said – what happened to the two of you?
Whatever you are doing – keep doing it.
‘Cause it’s working.”
This is why – really – we celebrate them when we graduate.
This is what it’s all about.
This s just a tiny window into what’s possible.
It was possible for their marriage.
It’s possible for yours, too.
You two could be the next Before & After Story.
For real.
And that’s what I’m doing in the Couples Program that’s starting next week.
Helping you get from the ‘Now’ that you don’t so much desire and create the future you do.
The deadline to sign up is Feb. 15th.
It’s coming up.
Do yourself a favor and don’t put it off.
I know you’ve waited long enough.
And so do you.
