There is a difference between fighting to surrender, and fighting to win.
Reality Check — Not all of my couples make it.
Sometimes they come, when they should have come months or years ago.
Other times, they come because they want to be able to say –
“We have done it ALL.
There is nothing else we could have done.”
To clear their conscience, so to speak.
(How well this works, I’m not so sure.)
To be able to sleep at night.
You’ve gotta know something.
I don’t want that for you.
I don’t want you to come and ‘fight to surrender’.
(I’m not even sure you can call that fighting.)
I don’t want you to wait SO long that this is the only purpose of you coming to see me.
Or anyone else.
Where all you do is, from the last of what’s left – you sort of put one foot in front of the next.
Where you just barely scrape the surface so that you can say – I did dust this thing off – a tiny little bit.
Not wanting to have someone say about you that you didn’t even show up the day of the race.
So you show up, but you barely put your shoes on your feet, you forget your laces (on purpose, to use as an excuse), you drag your exhausted behind (because, duh, party last night) to the starting line.
Having had too much booze to go to the grocery store and make sense of the purchases at 10am the next morning, let alone make your appearance to the race start line.
You’ve sort of resolved yourself that you’re gonna lose.
That, really, all you want to do is get it over with, so you can get back in bed.
But you can’t NOT show up.
Do you see what I mean?
Instead — I invite you to come BEFORE you get to that place.
Whether that’s my office or somebody else’s.
Where you get to the start line and you are determined to, TRULY, give it EVERYTHING you’ve got.
Get the best shoes.
Prepare in the best way possible.
Eat and drink the right things the night before.
Where you say – to yourself – and to each other – We’re so gonna put up a fight, you just watch.
Willing to do whatEVER it takes.
Both of us are.
Because —
This is YOUR MARRIAGE.
Your marriage that’s on the line and you know that.
Your Marriage. That family of yours. And your Life.
It’s worth the fight.
It’s worth the time, the energy, the effort.
There is a difference between fighting knowing you are just there to surrender, and fighting to win, knowing you’ve truly given it your all, ran like it was your first, your last and your only race – feeling good about being a little tired even or having a bruise on your knee or a blister between your toes.
You may not have gotten first place.
You may not have gotten it ‘perfect’ BUT –
Feeling proud to having done it at all AND having done it this way (instead of the other).
I SO want the latter for you two.
And if you are brutally honest with yourself, you know you do too.
That’s what I want to invite you to.
So, if you are ready, if you are ready and wanting to give it a real ‘run’ – For the sake of each other & your kids – Sign up for a call with me here and let’s get started.
