Why do I wear two rings on both of my hands?
Not because I’m so fancy.
In my culture, you wear your wedding band on your right hand.
So, I have this one here.
I don’t… whatever.
It doesn’t even matter.
So, I wear this one on this hand.
In the culture that I live, you wear it on the left hand.
I just—my husband wanted me to be covered.
Anybody else in the same boat?
Let me know below.
Are you getting ready to go to a family gathering?
Have you ever needed to get your spouse’s attention during one of those, but didn’t know how to do it?
Here’s what you can do.
This is the secret.
You create a secret code question that you can ask in front of everyone.
Like, “Do you have any ibuprofen by chance?”
That will be your cue to step aside for a minute and check in.
Ask the questions that you need to ask, or do the thing that you need to do.
It keeps you connected.
It will keep you aligned and calm, even if there’s a chaotic family experience happening right in front of you.
Do you want to stop arguments from spiraling in your marriage?
Here’s two words for you.
Stop interrupting.
When your spouse talks, you are to pause.
You’re to listen.
You’re to take a breath.
And you’re supposed to keep your feedback.
You’re not to interrupt.
You’re not to weave in your own opinions or your own experience, your own words, or your own interpretation for that matter.
You letting your spouse say what they need to say without interrupting them — it shows respect.
It helps you both feel heard.
And it can instantly calm this tense moment that you’re sitting in.
I want you to try it today.
You’re going to see the difference.
If you hear from your husband, from your wife, over and over, these words — “Let me finish,”
If they’re saying that to you, or “Stop talking,” or whatever the version of that is,
This is for you.
This is your sign that you need to pay attention.
Did you mess up?
Good.
That means that you get to do this.
No one gets it right all the time.
But repair — genuine repair with your spouse — is what builds resilience.
So own it.
Apologize.
Make it right.
Do whatever you need to.
That’s where connection grows.
Repair is more powerful than perfection.
They had a whole fancy night planned.
Reservations.
Outfits matching.
The works.
But halfway through, they ditched the restaurant.
They grabbed fries.
And they just drove.
They talked about their old dreams.
They talked about their kids.
Then they talked about who they were becoming.
And that’s when the spark came back.
Because real connection — real connection — beats perfect planning.
Every time.
This mistake is silently killing your connection.
You stopped being curious.
You think you already know them.
But people evolve.
People change.
So does your spouse, believe it or not.
So, my two cents: stay curious.
Ask new questions.
Ask old questions.
And find out that the answer doesn’t align with what you thought the answer was going to be.
Fall in love with the person they’ve become.
Fall in love with the person they’re becoming.
