If you want to protect your marriage, check your circle.
If you’re fighting for your marriage, surround yourselves with people who believe in fighting for theirs as well, just like you do.
It’s not about avoiding your divorced friends.
That’s not what I’m saying.
It’s about not being the only ones in your circle who value staying married.
Your environment shapes your mindset.
So, find your tribe.
Find your people.
Go and do it now.
Are you overwhelmed by constant chaos in your weeks?
One of my favorite tools that, for so many of my couples, has changed the game—and for my life and my family life and marriage—it’s called a family conference.
It’s the one conversation that can literally help you accomplish so many things.
Go watch the video now.
For most couples, they don’t even know this exists.
But once they try it, they literally never go back.
Ah, they never go back.
Here’s a marriage tip that you shouldn’t need, but I have been needing to say over and over.
Stop calling each other names.
So, you think it’s obvious?
You’d be surprised.
Whether it’s words that you bleep out on TV or calling each other stupid in front of the kids, what it’s doing is eroding the connection between you and your spouse.
Name-calling is just poison to your marriage.
No matter how small it feels to you in the moment, if you want a marriage that feels safe, cut it out.
Cut out the name-calling starting today.
Are you willing to commit to that?
Comment, “I’m ready,” if you’re willing to stop it with your spouse and build a connection instead.
Let me guess—you already have a shared calendar with your spouse.
Cool.
But if you’re still fighting about logistics, what’s for dinner, and pickups, your calendar is not the problem.
It’s that you’re not talking through it.
That’s where the family conference comes in.
One weekly check-in, 30 minutes or less, to stop the chaos before it starts.
Have you heard of that yet?
If you have not, go check out the last video that I posted.
It’s in the related video link.
If you are married and you have been for a while, you’ve got to remember this basic truth.
I learned this from Terry Real himself.
There’s your reality.
There’s your spouse’s reality.
And then there’s the reality of y’all’s relationship.
I want you to remember this the next time that your spouse approaches you, and you are tempted to go immediately to defensiveness.
It’s show and tell tonight.
How do you know, or what is it that your spouse does for you, that makes you feel loved?
I got one.
I know this isn’t bragging hour.
It’s just—we’re just sharing.
My hubby decided to put some magic on my windows called RainX.
If you don’t know what that is, you’re missing out.
This is what it looks like.
Can you see it?
I don’t even need to use the Billy windshield wipers at all.
I really want to know what yours is.
Let me know in the comments.
Fighting less.
Planning better.
Feeling like a real team again.
All that from just one conversation.
Do you know which one it is?
Do you know how to have one of those?
Forget the fact that it’s my favorite—but it’s so many of my couples’ favorite thing, too.
The best part?
You can learn how to do this thing and start having completely different weeks starting next.
