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What To Do With a Request (& The Fear that Follows)

    Even when, or ESPECIALLY when… Your husband, your wife approaches you with a request, you have GOT to remember this one thing. That’s ALL that it is. A request. YOU (and I) get to decide what to do with it. And this isn’t me saying – don’t listen to your spouse. Don’t take […]

How to Recover in Your Marriage at Rapid Speed

    How to RECOVER in your marriage from a relational micro-mishap at RAPID SPEED Some of you call them hiccups. Yes, those. Say these words out loud: “Hey, I don’t want to hold this over my head (or yours) all day long, can I just run it by you real quick? Assuming that your […]

On Vulnerability in Marriage

    On Vulnerability in Marriage – that’s what we are talking about today. I don’t know who needs to hear this but I JUST reminded a couple of this truth this morning. There’s a lot of talk about vulnerability. And intimacy. And how we all – supposedly – want that in our relationships. Including […]

Breaking My Own Rules in Public

    I’m not gonna lie. I was kind of horrified. You know how sometimes you realize you’re doing something that you didn’t even realize you were doing? Well that’s exactly what happened to me. This was definitely one of those times. I wasn’t smiling then.   What You Have to Know – First Thing’s […]

The Before & After of My Clients – Here’s What Happens Here

    I’m calling this the ‘Here’s What Happens Here’ Edition   THE BEFORE & AFTER of my Clients – The BEFORE PART   This couple, somewhere in their fifties, married twenty plus years. Walked in, both of them saying they weren’t particularly fulfilled in their marriage. “We really just would like to be able […]

Crying over Spilled Tea

    Sometimes, it’s hard to believe this stuff happens. I was doing the thing I always do – Drinking tea. Simple enough, right? As I’m about to put a fresh tea bag in, I realize I am not quite done so I lift the mug up to my face, and spill a bunch on […]

Rule Book – You Know You Have One, Too?

    Having done this for so long – in my mind, everybody knows. But then I run into someone, this week it was this older couple who had absolutely no idea. And of course, I’m the one who gets to point this out to them. Because staying in the not knowing – in the […]

The Cardinal Sins of Marriage 101

    If I were to write a book titled the 10 Cardinal Sins of Marriage, chapter 1 would be titled: STOP. Calling. Each. Other. Names !!!!! For the love of the universe. Seriously, though. Stop the name calling.   Some are the REALLY obvious ones. Those that rarely anyone would ever fight me on. […]

The Lie about Needing to Do Something BIG

    You tell me – You think that you need to do something Big. Something extravagant that will get you out of this hole that you are in with your spouse. That you need to find one big fix. One big thing. This is true for most of you – You don’t believe me […]

Challah, Chili and Your Marriage

    Challah, Chili and Your marriage. Let me venture to say – I bet you never tried. Tried what? – you say to yourself. Make Challah Bread and Chili. The same night of the week? Maybe. In the same bowl? Likely not. We all know that wouldn’t work. The bread would get beyond mushy […]

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HOW TO TALK TO YOUR SPOUSE 101

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